To weave or not to weave.....

Right....so I've had a wig??? there I said it...I wasn't natural??? I had fake hair and I fucking loved it!!! I loved it when it was groomed to perfection and I can swish the bastard around in peoples faces , I loved it when I could  produce a Cheryl Cole fish plait when needed and I loved the fact that when  naked and was  positioned right I could pull off a half decent sex pose without my usual passing out as I had breathed in so much and held it as I waiting for Marc to come upstairs..... that wig had huge potential and it will be sadly missed..... SO why did I get it taken out today..and why have I gone natural...?

 Well all the above is great, but in reality the fucker is itchy,expensive and 90% of the time made me look like a battered troll ...team that battered troll look with no make up and shitty uggs I looked like an extra from Shameless on the school run and along with frightening my kids in the morning I wasn't getting any fucking coffee invites from those mitten mothers up the school...not that I would had gone but its always nice to be in the croc gang just in case I ever needed banana bread..... 

So as I sit here now I type with my new mature barnet...I have gone for a blonde bob...layered to soften my chubby face and lightened to highlight my eyes.......£100 later and a clip in my hair I leave the salon feeling naked wondering if my life is ever gonna be the same again without him,..... Mum loved it..... thats always a bad sign as shes boss eyed and Irish...Frankie turned his nose up and asked why my eyebrows were like caterpillars ( I had them dyed today as well to try and big up the hair).....and layla just snotted on me and asked why I looked like a boy.... not going too well but Marc was gonna love it as he had always moaned about the wig... he hated it, especially when it shed on his pillow and sometimes at a glance I used to think he had grown a rats tail overnight...only to look again and see it was a long bit of my weave....so the big reveal with Marc came....

"Na.... I dont like it? and what the fuck have you done to your eye brows? "

And then he ate his pie and fucked off to play football....

And that was that? 

Im not going to lower myself and abuse him as that was the old wig me... the new me is over that and all I will say on the matter is ......" I will return....bigger and better wigged up...and at some point  I will shed endless amounts of hair all over him and his pillow as he sleeps quietly in his QPR shorts.....

RIP WIGGY 2011-2012